Three Principles to “SAY NO”

Have you ever been in a situation where you clearly wanted to say no but was unable to do that. Well, we all have been in a situation where we strongly wanted to say no but still over-commit ourselves by saying yes. Be it to our friends, family, colleague, boss or anyone. And guess what, we ultimately end up wondering why we’re feeling so stressed and burned out at the end of the day.

You can do anything but not everything
But why the heck we keep saying yes even though our heart and mind is clearly saying NO?

Well there could be many reasons. Sometimes, we say yes because we don’t want to feel guilty about saying no. Or sometimes, we want to impress our boss at workplace and end up saying yes to every project or meetings. Other reason can be that we don’t want to make another person feel inconvenient even though it’s inconvenient to us. Well, everyone has their own reasons of saying no.

But you know what the problem is? Saying yes to almost anything or everything do not let us do the things that we really want. Because most of the time, we are more busy with what people want us to do. But love, its time to take a step back and get more mindful about what you say yes to. Keep on reading, because today on blog, I’m sharing three tips to help you say no and stop over-committing yourself.

HOW TO SAY NO AND STOP OVER-COMMITTING YOURSELF

Three ways to say no and stop over-committing yourself

1. Say No by prioritizing your time and needs

take your time

In order to feel clear about when to say no, you need to learn about prioritizing your time and needs. Sometimes, the root cause of our confusions is the lack of awareness about significant and insignificant needs. And ultimately, we end up saying yes to every request or invitation. So the key is to get clear about what is important for you throughout the day. It can be anything like finishing your tasks, family time, self-care routine, workout and alike. Once you’ll be aware about what is important at the current moment, then instead of feeling confused, you’ll find it easier to say no.

Read this post if you find it hard to prioritize your tasks throughout the day.

2. BE STRAIGHTFORWARD YET KIND

If you’re clear and sure that you want to say no, then say it clearly. Remove the excuses and be assertive and courteous with your words. If you give some stupid excuses to say no and get caught up in the future, you know how embarrassing it can be. Another problem with offering an excuse is that it gives people the opportunity to change their request so that your excuse doesn’t justify your no. The people who understand you will appreciate your clear no.

you can be a good person with kind heart and can still say no

Use a polite approach to say no like –

  • I really appreciate your invite but unfortunately, I’ll not able to make it that day. I’ll really miss it though, hope you have a great time.
  • I really appreciate your thinking of me to work on this project. But I have more on my plate than I know what to do with right now so I’m not available this time around. It means a lot that you think highly of my work.

Check out these 80 ways to say polite no.

3. OFFER AN ALTERNATIVE

There are situations where you’ve a very close and sensitive relationship with people you can’t say no to. In such cases, instead of mounting up yourself with stress of saying yes, offer them an alternative that satisfies their want.

For example –

  • If someone wants you to collaborate with them on a project at workplace and you’re not interested, introduce them to someone who might be interested in that project.
  • If your friend wants you to join at bar or dinner or for something which is not your cup of tea. You can simply tell them that it’s not your thing and can ask them if they want to grab coffee or some other activity.

I hope this blogpost will help you to say no when you’ll feel stressed or confused about any invitation or request next time.

About the author

Shweta

My name is Shweta Thangri. I truly believe that our life is shaped by our thoughts, so I’m here to make change in your lives with my practically acknowledged skills and help you meet your higher self.

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