Have you ever doubt yourself for not doing good enough even though you’re doing multiple efforts to make your life better every day? Sometimes, we are overwhelmed by number of things to do, yet we feel that we’re not really doing good. May be because we expect more from ourselves. Or sometimes we think we need to be ahead from where we are right now. Or may be you have that list of things “back in your mind” that you think you must be doing or have done by now.
No matter how good you’re doing in your life, it never seems to be enough. And I believe social media is serving as a breeding ground to this problem. It has become very effortless to compare our life with the highlights of someone else’s life. Another reason can be that seeing other people’s success can also trigger this feeling of inadequacy. Moreover, not being grateful or satisfied with what god has blessed us with can also generate the feeling of being unsatisfied.
Keep Reading because today on the blog, I’m sharing the root causes of this feeling of not doing good enough.
I’ve met people who are at the pinnacles of success but still they keep struggling for more. They always want more from life. And when they tell me the reason that they’re not really doing good enough and this is why, they want to do this and that and achieve more, it’s quite difficult for me to digest. Of course, you should be unstoppable and there’s always a room for improvement, but at the same time you should not forget your purpose for being here on this earth. Do not get lost somewhere in the crowd of never ending rat race. Do not forget to make a life while making a living.
When you start to feel that you’re not doing good enough, it’s very easy to get depressed and overwhelm yourself even more. Feeling like you should or could be doing better will only add stress on your already heavy shoulders. This is why it’s very significant to have a sense of satisfaction and gratefulness.
By being satisfied, I don’t mean to get lazy and let the life happen to you. What I mean here is, instead of building up the mounts of stress that you’re not doing good enough, you should rather work on your present and make consistent efforts to build a better future. You should focus on how you can better the things instead of feeling worried about them and doubting yourself.
THE ROOT CAUSE OF THE FEAR OF NOT DOING GOOD ENOUGH
Well there are numerous reasons which triggers this feeling. Let’s talk about them.
1. PERFECTIONISM TRIGGERS THE FEELING OF NOT DOING GOOD ENOUGH
Well by now we all know that nobody on this globe is perfect. Then why do we ruin the momentum in the chase of perfection. The expectation of being perfect leads you nowhere. Rather when you don’t meet your “state of perfection”, it adds stress and discomfort in your life. It makes you feel doubtful about yourself and leads you to the state of not feeling good enough even after putting relentless endeavours. Even though you’ve done great, if that is not your idea of perfection, you’ll never be satisfied. Learn to celebrate the little achievements.
I once read a book THE POWER OF FOCUS where the author describes about how everything in life is built with little tiny actions. How good relationships flourish with small efforts – sending a good morning message, sharing memes, cracking jokes or meeting up for coffee. Overtime, these little things are the ones which build closer relationships. Well if I talk about my experiences, the moments that holds a special place in my heart are very little ones. This reminds me that the small things that I do – no matter how perfect or imperfect they are, are actually worthwhile.
2. COMPARISON TRIGGERS THE FEELING OF NOT DOING GOOD ENOUGH
Another reason for feeling unsatisfied is the comparison game. Whenever I find myself comparing with others, the feeling of not being good enough follows itself. Before you compare yourself with anyone, just ask yourself – Am I seeing the full picture of someone’s life. Whatever you see on social media or whatever people tell you about their successes is just a highlight reel. Or you can say a curated version that people wants you to see. And I feel it’s not bad because creating (even if it’s sharing your mundane life in an interesting way) is an art.
Have you ever realized that we don’t really compare our life with our friends and family. Why? Because we are not only aware about their successes but struggles too. We know behind the scenes of that success. And it reminds me that we all have high and lows. So comparing your life with others and feeling that you’re not good enough is like pushing yourself in the comparison trap knowingly.
Related Post – Habits that are thief of joy and how to overcome them.
3. PRESSURE TRIGGERS THE FEELING OF NOT DOING GOOD ENOUGH
It’s not always necessary that you’ll get recognition for everything that you do. Or it’s not necessary that your efforts will always be put into notice. And this feeling of getting unnoticed can easily make you feel that you’re not doing good enough. Though you’re doing plenty, you still pressurize yourself for doing more. And this pressure can manifest itself from internal expectations that you set for yourself and the outside world like work, society, relationships etc.
You know it’s us and our own thoughts which overwhelm us more than anything. So, it’s very important to have mindset check-in throughout the day to know that you’re not feeling overwhelmed. Ask yourself – Am I the one who is causing this extra stress. If yes, take the ownership and fix it asap. And if the answer is no, ask yourself that how you can set boundaries and stop over-committing yourself.
“FOCUS LESS ON WHAT YOU ‘SHOULD BE DOING’ AND FOCUS MORE ON WHAT YOU ‘NEED TO DO”
3 TIPS WHEN YOU FEEL THAT YOU’RE NOT DOING GOOD ENOUGH
In this blog post, I’m sharing some tips that how I deal with this feeling. If you feel like “I am not doing good enough”, here are some practical tips to counter this fear.
1. DO FEWER THINGS WITH MORE INTENTION
It’s not necessary to have longer to-do list in order to feel productive throughout the day. Sometimes we commit to do plenteous of things at once. But unfortunately, the divided attention makes it difficult to move forward. The best way for staying focused is to be clear about your goals and top priorities in life. This will protect you from unnecessary comparisons and distractions.
Even though we’re doing enough, we start doubting ourselves. Why? Because we feel we are not doing what others are doing. And this is nothing, but a comparison trap which can hold you back. If you’ll be clear about what you want from your life, you can plan things in a simplified manner. And can focus more on significant things. You don’t need to do everything, rather fewer things in an extraordinary way. There’s always something more that you can do but remember, everything is not necessary. Focus on what aligns with the vision you have for your life, career, family, health etc.
Related Post – How to create an intentional life plan.
2. SET REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS FROM YOURSELF
You know most of our disappointments come from the unrealistic goals and expectations that we set for ourselves. It’s very important to know your passion and strength. Because otherwise, you’ll just keep revolving around the things that are not meant for you. Remember what make others successful will not necessarily work for you in the same way. Why? Because it might not be your forte.
Identify what you’re passionate about, what are your strengths and in which areas you can give your best without feeling monotonous. By being realistic, I mean to be realistic about your goals and the amount of time and energy you put into it. You can’t set unrealistic expectations like getting successful overnight. Or losing 20 pounds in merely two days. Setting unrealistic expectations will only make you feel that you’re behind or not doing good enough.
3. IDENTIFY WHERE YOUR TIME GOES
If you feel like even after putting enough efforts, you can’t see the results, track where your time goes. It’s very significant to keep a log of what you do on daily basis. I myself was indulged into number of activities which were not even necessary. But then, I tracked my time for a week. And realized that I was doing lot of things that were totally insignificant. So, try to evaluate your time and see where your efforts are going.
- It will help you to realize that
- You’re doing more than what is actually required.
Plan your schedule mindfully. A disciplined schedule will help you to put your time and energy in an efficient way without feeling pressurized.
Related Post – How to plan your day for success.
How do you deal with this feeling of inadequacy? Let me know in the comment section below.